Dating or Friendship: 5 Research Backed Ways to Make A Person Like You

Small Behavioural Changes and Little Gestures by You Could Influence a Person to Like You
By on
REFILE - CORRECTS DATE Actress Cheryl Hines (L) smiles at her boyfriend
REFILE - CORRECTS DATE Actress Cheryl Hines (L) smiles at her boyfriend Robert F. Kennedy Jr. during ceremonies honoring Hines with a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame in Hollywood, California in this file photo from January 29, 2014. The couple married August 2, 2014 before family and friends gathered at the Kennedy compound in Hyannis Port on Cape Cod, Massachusetts, according to media reports. Reuters/Fred Prouser/Files (UNITED STATES - Tags: ENTERTAINMENT) Reuters

There is no definite formula to win yourself a place in somebody's heart, you never know the people you are going to meet and the ones you will most likely grow a bond with. It is all matter of chance. Though fate determines who you meet in life, research states you can determine who gets to stay. Making a person like you and stay with you, is totally in your hands and there are psychological researches that show small behavioural changes and little gestures by you that could influence a person to like you. There are six research-backed ways to gain a special place in somebody's heart.


When you copy another person's behaviour it is called mirroring. It is seen that when you copy another person they tend to like you. Chartrand and John Bargh, two professors of Psychology at New York University conducted an experiment and found that a person who copies another was liked by the other in the first meet itself, even though they were total strangers before they met. This phenomenon is what Chartrand and John Bargh calls the Chameleon Effect.  But you must keep in mind to copy the other subtly and not seem like you are mocking their body language.

Appreciate the other

Compliments are the way to a person's heart. It gives them an impression that you notice them and it also influences how they see you. This is what psychologists call spontaneous trait transference. Most people relate to you with the adjectives with which you describe them. According to the Ohio State University researchers' study which was published in the American Psychological Association's (APA) Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, this phenomenon is largely "outside of conscious awareness." This happens unknowingly and the person tends to relate with the other depending on traits that person attributes to them. They could not however find a definite reason for this natural tendency among people. So remember, "If you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all".

Stay happy, people love to stick around happy people

A research conducted by the University of Ohio and the University of Hawaii, people can sense the emotions of others, this happens without their knowledge. So when you are in a great mood it affects the people around as well and if a good mood is what your presence can give them, they are never going to leave you. While a great mood can leave the person you're with, in a feeling of ecstasy a bad mood can ruin theirs as well.

Lend them a shoulder

"A friend in need is a friend indeed," if you watch out for another and stand with him in his hard times, it gives an impression of genuineness and a feeling that you care. University of Virginia's research paper found that even the thought of a caring friend made the participants in a stressful task feel that it was easier than before. This is due to recollection of the social support they gave them in the past, this gave them mental strength to complete the hard task at hand.

Show them you are not perfect

Nobody can relate to someone who comes across as extremely perfect, because in reality there is no one who is absolutely perfect. It is seen that after one commits a mistake people tend to start liking him more, this is called the Pratfall Effect. This theory was tested by psychologist Elliot Aronson, he found that the male students from the University of Minnesota who were made to listen to tape recordings of people who took a quiz liked those who did well and spilled coffee at the end of the quiz more than those who just did well.

Join the Discussion