Couples Who Fight The Most, Love Each Other Most
By Usha Hari | August 25, 2014 6:25 PM EST
Studies have found that couples who fight the most love the most! In a true relation it is natural for the partners to scream, fight, stomp and swear, which may not necessarily be as bad as you thought before. Though the bickering of the warring couples makes the neighbours complain, and the dogs irritated, it could well be a way to express their love for many.
A couple sits under an umbrella for shade from the sun at the beach in La Jolla, California May 12, 2014. A high pressure system is expected to bring record breaking heat to Southern California over the next few days.
According to Dr. John M. Gottman of the Gottman Institute, fighting isn't a sign of a weak relationship, but a strong one, depending on how you're fighting.
There are three basic styles, according to Gottman via Elite Daily:
1. Those who want to sit down, compromise, and get back to being comfortable with each other.
2. Those who want to be heard immediately and have the other person agree with them.
3. Those who have no interest in dealing with problems.
The first approach, though could involve emotional outbursts and red faces it need not be always a bad thing to happen because it usually ends in compromise and peace. Though the fighting part will be painful, it could lead to a better and stronger relation.
In the second approach, a partner might not be willing to listen or work a way out of the problem. In this case the fighting is not productive and your partner simply does not deserve your time. Here the partner is not interested in fighting, more so shouting.
The third is the most dangerous approach in any relation. It involves no swearing, stomping or shouting and might give off a picture of a perfect relation for an outside observer. It would seem that a couple who never fights is the happiest. However, in reality it is just the opposite. The couple who care for each other often fight to remain in the relation and to battle it out instead of walking out of it without even making a try. Only people who are in a meaningful and loving relation can do that.
When the going gets tough it is easy to walk away, but a sign of true love is the willingness to withstand the trying times and the pain and work towards a feasible solution by working through constructive criticism and a good fight. No two people can agree on everything, and fighting just means that the partners are eager to deal with their problem and to iron out a solution rather than to just walk away conceding defeat and wrecking the relation.