Stacey Solomon: Depression, Teen Mums and Me (BBC)
Stacey Solomon has said she felt like the worst mother in the world while suffering from postnatal depression after her first child.
The 23-year-old mum of two is looking at PNT for a BBC3 documentary; Stacey Solomon: Depression, Teen Mums and Me.
In it, Solomon meets young mothers who are struggling from the condition; one woman had her children taken into care while another became psychotic.
It is estimated that every year, 35,000 women in England and Wales struggle with symptoms of PNT and do not seek professional help.
A report by charity 4Children found one in ten new mothers will experience PND but less than half of them will receive treatment.
PNT is a type of depression that some women experience after having a birth. Normally it develops four to six weeks after childbirth but it can surface months after the baby is born. Symptoms include a low mood, feeling unable to cope, problems sleeping,
In the documentary, Solomon recounts her own experience of the disease after having Zach at 18: "After being diagnosed by my GP, I was scared to talk to anyone or get help. I remember feeling really trapped in it and there was nothing else; just me in a room with a baby.
"I remember being downsters and walking into the kitchen and thinking: 'If I go in the kitchen I won't be able to hear him cry as much.' I'd just wonder around the house thinking eventually he will stop or eventually I won't be able to hear him.
Worst mum in the world
"I remember sitting by the radiator and just crying my eyes out thinking: 'I can't make toast. How am I going to look after a baby if I can't make toast.' I thought 'I'm the worst mum in the world'."
Solomon explains that she did not want to tell anyone she was suffering from PNT because of the stigma attached to the disease.
In the film, the presenter looks at how where women live will affect the treatment they receive - many teenagers are left unable to cope alone.
Eventually Solomon's mother - who had also suffered PNT - helped her get better by suggesting she go away on holiday without Zach. While away, Solomon began to miss her child and she started to get better.
Speaking to the Mirror, she said: "Emotionally, I've definitely matured so I can look back and reflect on the way I felt. I have to be guilty and bear that guilt.
"The only thing I can hope and pray for is that my children are happy and don't ever feel that I have done anything intentionally to make them upset."
Stacey Solomon: Depression, Teen Mums and Me is on BBC3 at 9pm tonight (Tuesday).
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